A couple days ago, I had a Huge personal triumph that I want to share, with a little backstory of why it's one of the most empowering moments of my life so far. I GOT A CAR! Here's why it's a big deal...
I never thought a series of Fortunate events could start with rolling my car three times & landing upside down in a ditch. February 20th, 2014 that's exactly what happened. My life has looked like a country song ever since--I lost my car, my man, my house, my job (well, it's changed significantly, as transportation is essential to being a touring comedian)...And it all happened within the month after the accident. Oh, AND I was taking care of my 2nd momma (of 22 years), and her two granddaughters (my "nieces"), because she's in stage-4, terminal cancer----ALL in the last 9 weeks.
Last month, I came down to Orlando to do a personal empowerment workshop called P3--by some grace & wisdom of the Universe, I'd applied to do it BEFORE the accident. In case you were wondering about the existence of a higher power or divine order or just crazy dumb luck.
I've been staying at my mother's house, which is difficult at best--occasionally borrowing her car, desperate for some semblance of freedom, etc...
I've had SO MUCH support through all of this, that I can't even say I've been "holding it together." I haven't. As a matter of fact, I've fallen apart more times than a house of cards on a washing machine during an earthquake! With a LOT of help from friends new and old, what I've been able to do is PROCESS. Thank you.
...So, about this CAR! I prayed. A lot. Not to any specific deity, because I'm a religionless heathen who just happens to have a long, colorful history with spirit guides and the dead. Seriously, I was all Sixth-Sense as a kid. Without the being dead part. Spoilers aren't spoilers once a movie has been out for 15 years. Suckit, internets.
I asked for the Perfect car to manifest for me. And WHEN IT DID, it came with a much greater lesson: Step into, and remain in my power, in a high-pressure, high-stakes situation by standing up for myself in a calm, confident way. No small feat for a gal who neither fights, flights, nor submits. Historically, I freeze. But, with LOADS of help, I was able to do it! I took a fellow-P3-graduate friend (that has both sales experience and knowledge of cars) with me to the dealership, and we made a plan. He encouraged me to speak, which I did; and he advocated for me by barking back at the sales manager when the yelling and intimidation tactics came out. I calmly and confidently called out some discrepancies in the contract, asserted all the things I needed to be happy with the car and the transaction, and got them to drop the price of the car almost $3000! SUCCESS!!!
This new car symbolizes (and facilitates) a whole new Life for me. Instead of getting back on the road to continue a life where I was dying, I get to drive toward a new life worth Living. This includes: Increasing the ways and means by which I perform stand-up, setting up and accepting speaking engagments to talk about my weight-loss journey and other experiences that may help people on their own journeys, & cultivating Fun & Joy in as many forms as I can schedule without burning out! I want to sing, practice yoga, play a sport, travel the world, learn a few new skills, use the talents I already have to express creativity to my fullest potential, and help others do the same.
For everyone who has expressed a desire to help me repay my sweet, dear old Grandma for the partial loan she gave to help get me into the car, an indiegogo campaign is about to be in full effect. THANK YOU FOR ANY AND ALL SUPPORT!
The GRATITUDE I feel for anyone who's done P3 and/or similar, self-improvement, self-awareness-building work is immeasurable. It's the most difficult, necessary work anyone can do because it shifts the consciousness of everyone and everything. Thank you. Infinite thanks. (Pic of the Old, Pic of the New!)